rejected

Although your extra-curricular activities and qualifications are impressive, the competition has been very keen and we regret to inform you that we will not be offering the scholarship to you.




Yet another reminder of how big of a failure i am.

au revoir

goodbye my love

sempurna - andra and the backbone

Kau begitu sempurna
Dimataku kau begitu indah
Kau membuat diriku akan slalu memujimu
Disetiap langkahku
Kukan slalu memikirkan dirimu
Tak bisa kubayangkan hidupku tanpa cintamu

Janganlah kau tinggalkan diriku
Takkan mampu menghadapi semua
Hanya bersamamu ku akan bisa

Kau adalah darahku
Kau adalah jantungku
Kau adalah hidupku
Lengkapi diriku
Oh sayangku, kau begitu
Sempurna... Sempurna...

Kau genggam tanganku
Saat diriku lemah dan terjatuh
Kau bisikkan kata dan hapus semua sesalku

Janganlah kau tinggalkan diriku
Takkan mampu menghadapi semua
Hanya bersamamu ku akan bisa

Kau adalah darahku
Kau adalah jantungku
Kau adalah hidupku
Lengkapi diriku
Oh sayangku, kau begitu
Sempurna... Sempurna...

Kau genggam tanganku
Saat diriku lemah dan terjatuh
Kau bisikkan kata dan hapus semua sesalku

ke mana insan sempurnaku menghilangkan diri?

elephant glue

i have to move on, sooner or later. too bad there's glue underneath my feet so i can't go anywhere. and i don want to rip the skin off my feet. so too bad, i'm here to stay.

roller coaster

life with you was no doubt a roller coaster. from the moment we got into the seats and buckled ourselves in, i knew it was gonna be the best ride ever. our hearts were beating so fast and hard that if you put microphones inside them they could be heard loud and clear. we looked at the track. there were loops, big and small, and the drops were so high up. imagining it was enough to give us goosebumps. i knew you were having them cause i ran my fngers up and down your arm, tracing the miniscule bumps as i comforted you. you were never a fan of thrill rides but you insisted on riding along for you didnt want a stranger sitting next to me sharing my joy for roller coasters. the operator then pressed the green button and the alarm went off. the ride was about to begin. the train slowly made its way up the track. as it climbed up, we clenched the bars tightly, your hand on mine. you looked at me and gave me a little peck on the cheek. blood rushed to my face and immediately kept me warm for the weather was chilly. finally we reached the peak. there was a momentary pause. without a warning, the train dove down with great speed and shot back up again. it was a whirlwind moment from then onwards. we went up, down, swerved to both left and right, upside down as the car rolled through the tracks with great momentum. we were screaming our heads off. i turned to you and noticed that you looked nauseous. you were going to throw up any minute but instead you held it in. it was clear that you didnt enjoy the ride one bit and couldnt wait to get off it. i didn't understand how u could not have possibly have fun. it was so exhilirating and i didn't want it to stop. but unlike a circle, the ride has to come to an end. when it halted and the bars went up, you sped out of your seat and made your way to the closest toilet and threw your guts out. i knew very well that you wouldn't want to get on the ride again but i asked anyway. you just gave me a cold stare and walked off. i just stood there, hoping that you would turn back and join me on the ride again. but you never turned back.

p.s. do come back, please

edited:
night fell. the park was about to shut its doors. you were nowhere to be seen. it was then i knew that you were never coming back, for me or the roller coaster.